The National Suicide Prevention Hotline offers you a toolkit for supporting people on social media, down to specific platforms like Facebook and Twitter. 2011;50(1):46-66. doi:10.1348/014466510X493926. Thank you, {{form.email}}, for signing up. 2006;8(2):151-61. I’m here for you. 2.1 1. If You Suspect a Friend or Loved One is Thinking of Suicide. Depression is a real—and treatable—illness. Cheer up, buddy! Sometimes people who are depressed just need to talk without having the conversation taken over with well-meaning advice. Too many people with clinical depression feel alone—a state that only worsens their condition. If you don't know what to say, just say that—and tell your friend that you are there for them. You can beat this.’The hopelessness of depression stands with its arms crossed, blocking the door to anything better. If you don’t the person very well, ask them outright what is troubling them. Beyond words, what really matters is your presence. Thank you for expressing how sad you are about the situation, because regardless of circumstance, it’s a sad thing to happen. It's terrible." Instead, when trying to figure out what to say to someone who lost a loved one, try this. “People who are depressed know that they’re not in a desirable condition, and yet they still want to be viewed as desirable,” Shenell D. Evans, Ph.D., a psychologist in New York, told The Mighty. Social support, particularly family support, has a protective factor for both depression and anxiety. Instead, make it clear that you are there for them. Would you like me to drive you to your doctor appointments. The article 10 Things Not to Say to a Suicidal Person is SpeakingOfSuicide.com’s most popular post. Expressions like ‘tough love’, ‘big girl panties’ and ‘sad sack’ might swirl in our heads. While reaching out to someone with depression can’t cure them, social support can remind them they’re not alone. Sometimes people will lash out at those trying to help them because they are hurting and don't know where to direct those bad feelings. Yes, this is true, but when people are depressed, they feel trapped, and they want a permanent solution, so such a statement would be futile. You are sad because you’re a personal problem or any other reason, you need these sad quotes that you can read and share with others to express your feelings.. Life isn’t easy for anyone, but you need to pass the test every time or else you will be left alone behind all the people. 2016;209(4):284-293. doi:10.1192/bjp.bp.115.169094, Ⓒ 2021 About, Inc. (Dotdash) — All rights reserved, Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. All rights reserved. While you may feel awkward and unsure at first, know that whatever you say doesn't have to be profound or poetic. These are statements in a conversation which help someone to feel listened to, understood, and hopeful that things can improve. When someone’s depressed, they may feel the exact opposite. Here are some suggestions for talking with a depressed person. Neuropsychiatr Dis Treat. Through the use of medications and therapy, your friend has a very good chance of returning to feeling normal again. The symptoms of depression aren’t personal. I’m also a depressed person with autism, and I have to say, the reason why I’m depressed is because I live on 1722 Broxon Street, but me, my parents and sister are moving right out of the house and moving to a house that’s really close to my school. If someone close to you is feeling sad, use the motivating words to help lift them back up. Nancy has a lifetime of experience with depression, experiencing firsthand how devastating this illness can be. If your friend only recently started taking medications or attending counseling, it can take time for them to begin to feel better. If you know the person, you will most likely already be familiar with their problems. Reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 800-273-8255 for free, confidential support 24/7. Spend Some Time With Them; 2.4 4. Find out more about these issues, from death to stress to family and…, A new study suggests that an increase in physical activity can help significantly lower the risk of depression among individuals with risk or higher…. Andrews G. Should depression be managed as a chronic disease?. If you know someone feeling sad, hugging it out is really comforting. When someone you care about is mad, sad, scared, or depressed, it’s important not to say the wrong thing. Best Things to Say to Someone Who Is Depressed. Loneliness as a specific risk factor for depressive symptoms: Cross-sectional and longitudinal analyses. If someone talks about killing themselves, feeling hopeless, being a burden, having no reason to live, or feeling trapped, be concerned. What to say to someone who has depression, American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, What to do if you think a friend is considering suicide, a toolkit for supporting people on social media, Yoga, Running, and Other Workouts Can Combat Depressive Episodes, 7 Signs That It’s Time to Revisit Your Mental Health Treatment Plan, Too Exhausted to Eat? Acknowledging how hard depression and its symptoms can be can help them feel seen. Dialogues Clin Neurosci. We humans are a complex bunch, and even with all the loving intent in the worldit can be difficult to know what to say. Sometimes you just need to listen. A hug or a gentle touch of the hand can even get this message across. perhaps ask, "Could I come over on Saturday morning and do some yard work for you?". Support — both social support and professional — is important. For those of us who live with invisible illnesses, mental health may not always get the level of care it needs. Phrases like ‘Cheer up!’ or ‘It is what it is’ or ‘Toughen up’ can sometimes spill from our lips. Be prepared with a few specific suggestions, which may include: Being specific in regards to both the time and the activity can be helpful. During this time, what your friend needs most is not references to fast, easy solutions, but an awareness that you will be by their side through their treatment. Depression can make many people feel alone and like they should isolate. In my opinion, avoiding the subject is the worst tactic. Here, mental health experts share exactly what to say to someone who is depressed, so you can be there for your loved ones in need. But they can help. You can also be more specific to what you love about them or how you appreciate them for something they do. I am a 9th grader at East Junior High. Read 10 Things You Should Never Say To A Depressed Person. Expressions like ‘tough love’, ‘big girl panties’ and ‘sad sack’ might swirl in our heads. Hiding the problem won’t make it go away. Frequently, we say the exact wrong thing even though our intentions are good. Or just put your arm around them or hold their hand. The Best 10 Things You Can Say 1. So, what should you say to someone who has depression? 1. Knowing what to say to someone who is depressed isn't always easy. This can be hard to believe when depressed, but can also be incredibly helpful in a crisis. Healthline Media does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It is also possible that depression may leave your friend so tired and down that they don't even know what kind of help to ask for. Validating that the experience of anxiety and depression is difficult is one of the most helpful things you can say. Depression is a medical condition. I decided to approach things from the other direction in this article, and detail ten things that you can, and indeed should, say to someone with anxiety. It doesn’t help anyone involved if you try making excuses, covering up the problem, or lying for a friend or family member who is depressed. If what you have been through was just a case of the blues, on the other hand, your friend may feel like you are trivializing their experience by comparing it to yours. Keep in mind that someone who is sad may not want to talk to anyone about what they are feeling. Nancy Schimelpfening, MS is the administrator for the non-profit depression support group Depression Sanctuary. You should try it.”, “So many people out there are worse off than you.”, looking for a way to end their life, such as searching online for methods, withdrawing from activities and isolating from family and friends, visiting or calling people to say goodbye, giving away prized possessions or acting reckless, other symptoms of depression, such as aggression, fatigue, and sleeping too much or too little. Instead, let them know that you are sorry that they are feeling so badly and adopt an attitude of acceptance that this is how their depression is affecting them. Pharmacological Treatments. That’s why telling someone that they’re important to you, that you need them in their life, and that they matter can be so comforting. The purpose of this is to simply acknowledge that you realize how hard it is for them. Pharmacological Treatments, Social support and protection from depression: Systematic review of current findings in Western countries. Don't accuse, threaten, blame, or make light of what your friend is feeling. Physical contact can be very reassuring. Approaching them and offering your support sends a powerful message that they’re not alone. It is one of saddest truths we have to confront in life that unless we're talking about a child with a bumped knee, a hug and kiss cannot heal, no matter how much love we pack into them. However, there…. Last medically reviewed on June 12, 2020 Depression These 5 Go-To Recipes Will Comfort You, FDA-Approved Ketamine Nasal Spray Cuts Depression Symptoms in 24 Hours, First FDA-Approved Drug for Postpartum Depression Is Expected to Cost More Than $30,000, What to Know About Treating Depression During Pregnancy, Zara Risoldi Cochrane, Pharm.D., M.S., FASCP, The Importance of Mental Health While Living with an Invisible Illness, “Just think happy thoughts. While depression is an illness, those who live with it may feel that it's a character flaw. 2011;7(Suppl 1):3-7. doi:10.2147/NDT.S19617, Gariépy G, Honkaniemi H, Quesnel-Vallée A. Suggest—and listen. You may not quite know what this will look like at first, but know that just reminding your friend that you are someone they can lean on can mean the world. Kennedy SH, Lam RW, Mcintyre RS, et al. They may believe they have a character flaw. Most of the times, the help that they need is simply a few encouraging words. It is not always easy to know what to say when a person you care about is clinically depressed. Sometimes people feel ashamed by the depth of their sadness post-breakup, especially if it was a short, intense fling or someone … Even science has backed up the importance of social support. You can say it as it is to let them know that you want to help ease even a little of their pain. In this case, it would be best to simply admit that you don't understand exactly what they are going through, but you care about them and want to try. You probably won’t be believed the first time you say this, but just keep saying it and believing it enough for both of you. Here’s why that needs to change. When you reach out to a friend, letting them know that you are going to be there every step of the way can be very reassuring. Reading the Sweet Things You Should Say to Comfort Your Depressed Girlfriend may also help. When you want to say more, but have a hard time expressing what you feel, try referencing the following statements someone who is depressed might find helpful to hear. When you find out someone is depressed, it’s tempting to attempt to immediately try and “fix” the problem.   You need to take care of your own emotional and mental health before you can help someone else with theirs. It’s also common for depressed people to say hurtful things and lash out in anger. Sometimes a good hug helps someone feeling sad more than you can possibly imagine. 3. Let Me Help You Feel Better This statement is a very general thing to say to someone who is suffering from depression or suicidal feelings. 2. 2017;52(12):1463-1473. doi:10.1007/s00127-017-1440-7, Griffiths KM, Crisp DA, Barney L, Reid R. Seeking help for depression from family and friends: A qualitative analysis of perceived advantages and disadvantages. If this happens, try not to take it personally. This is from the data we have. When you find out someone is depressed, it’s tempting to attempt to immediately try and “fix” the problem. Research has shown that the likelihood of depression in the past year has reduced with high-quality social connection. It's possible that you can say all the "right" things and your friend will still become upset with you. Reminding someone … Benazzi F. Various forms of depression. Here are some words to say that will show your support, while acknowledging the depressed person's right to feel his or her feelings. Remember to listen first. Whether your anxiety is particularly bad, or your stress levels are through the roof, finding the energy to eat can sometimes feel like too much to…, Esketamine nasal spray appears both effective and fast acting for treatment-resistant depression, but questions still remain about the drug’s safety…, The FDA approved the first drug developed to treat postpartum depression Tuesday. The Best Things To Say 1. Depressed people may not necessarily be in a state of mind to know or say what will help them, but just hearing someone's willingness and openness can help lift their spirits. Those who are coping with depression tend to feel weak or that there is something wrong with them. Why it’s harmful: Blaming someone with depression for making you sad can worsen their condition by making them feel even more ashamed and humiliated than they already do, Dr. Duckworth says. 7 Best and Worst Things to Say to Someone With Depression. When you want to say more, but have a hard time expressing what you feel, try referencing the following statements someone who is depressed might find helpful to hear. You can also attach other statements such as: • Do you need a hug? What do you say to someone who is severely depressed? Reminding someone that you’re there for them whenever they need you — whether that’s in the form of help with a small task or someone to call in a crisis — can be so essential to saving a life. Supervisor, teacher, and a lack of motivation what your friend a! The symptoms a little is sad may not want to be with them these what to say to someone who is sad will. 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